Log Lines for the Elevator Pitch

I was just listening to WANA International’s Marcy Kennedy and her webinar on log lines and thought I would try revising the one I have been using for Blood Lust:

“In this supernatural thriller, a former shipyard worker must defeat an ancient vampire cult in order to save two parallel worlds, and the woman who fired him.”

Too much? Not enough?

After reading the line, what is the first question that comes to your mind?

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “Log Lines for the Elevator Pitch

  1. I liked it except for the “woman who fired him.” It doesn’t seem to be a good enough connection especially for the romance element. But the lines were very snappy. I like that.

  2. My first question was “A former shipyard worker?”. And the second was “He needs to save her, too?” Geez…as if saving two parallel universes isn’t enough on your plate…
    But that doesn’t mean I’m not intrigued!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s