Vanity – an equal opportunity evil

The Sale

“Geez, are you okay? I mean, really, do I need to call someone?”

Walt Turner was embarrassed enough, no need to call any more attention to himself. He wanted to kick himself for even walking in the door to a place like this, but the girl was cute and the prices seemed reasonable. Call someone? Certainly not his wife, that’s for sure.

Now, bent over at the waist, with his lower back seized up, Walt came to the inescapable conclusion that his middle-aged body could not keep up with his brain’s desire to relive the activities of his youth.

“No. It’s just a twinge. I’ll be fine in a minute.”

The twenty-something girl, while experienced in her trade, had never had a customer injure themselves before physical activity. Most of her customers felt great until the next day, when their body realized it had used muscles that had laid dormant for years.

“Okay, if you say so. Ummm, let’s just postpone the deal for a while. Here, take your money back.”

Walt, glancing up from his stooped body, silently agreed by pocketing the wad of twenties. The back pain was quickly being replaced by the guilt of being foolish.

“Listen, will you be here this next weekend? I mean, I think a couple of Motrin and a few days with a heating pad should do the trick, but I didn’t want to try this again unless you were here.” Trying to inject some humor into the situation, Walt managed to wink at his companion.

The girl giggled. “Why Mr. Turner, you are such a cutie. Of course, I am always here. And if I’m not here, it’s because I am with a customer somewhere. I tell you what, you come back when you’re feeling better and I will give you a discount.”

Putting on his best face, Walt Turner replied “It’s a date. See you Saturday sometime.”

Walt slowly shuffled his way out the door. Seeing his car parked down the street, he mumbled out loud “Real smooth, Walt. Only you could go into a sporting goods store and hurt yourself just by picking up the box of weights…”

© D.J. Lutz – March 2011

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2 thoughts on “Vanity – an equal opportunity evil

  1. This one is actually fiction all the way. But…it wouldn’t surprise anyone here at home if I ended up in this situation someday…

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